Updated: Apr 8, 2020
I've been working on doing what I want--specifically finding what brings me joy and then doing it. Not just doing it in general, but doing what brings me joy when the idea comes to me. If I feel an impulse to do something, it's for a reason. There are no accidents. Everything that happens is meant to happen; it's a blessing or a lesson. If you feel a strong impulse to do something, it's source energy, your inner being, trying to guide you. This has helped me tap into so much positive energy. I feel lighter. I feel better. I feel like I can do anything and everything I want.
As we are deep in the holiday season (with Christmas right around the corner), I've given out a lot of gifts to my coworkers because it's what I wanted to do. Time and time again, I was told that I shouldn't have, that it was too much, I'm too generous, so on and so forth. The thing is it felt like the right amount. It felt just right. It was what I wanted to do, and I felt great doing what I wanted to do. I want to share positivity with those in my life. I'm not letting others tell me how to live my life--if I want to give gifts, I'm going to do it. I didn't do it feeling like I had to, that I ought to, that I should. It all boiled down to wanting to. It felt so good to do what I want and show my appreciation to others. If I had denied my impulse and desire to give gifts, I would have felt miserable because I didn't do what I wanted to. I would have regretted it. Since I chose to listen, though, I felt amazing! It didn't stop there.
After working before care on Friday, I went looking for some more goodies to share with those in my life. I originally went in looking for lavender bubble bath (I know a lot of stressed out people--I want to help reduce and relieve that stress. No one likes being stressed). The store I went to was all out. Most would say that's disappointing, sure. I had this impulse to look around the rest of the store, however (I listened to this impulse--it's what I have been hearing time and time again from Abraham Hicks' videos; do it when you're thinking about it because source energy/the vortex/your inner being is helping you get what you want). I found a bunch of books to share with my loved ones as well as space stickers for one of my after care kiddos (he struggles with impulse control, body control, listening ears, etc. but he is obsessed with space--specifically planets. He gathers balls in the gym to make his own solar system every single day; space makes him quite happy). I have been looking for planet stickers for weeks, and I finally found them.
Afterwards this shopping experience, I found a man that I often see on the way to my second job; he happens to be homeless, and I hadn't seen him in a while. I was a bit worried since it's been so cold and since there had been so much snow. I wanted to give him some more money (I often give him cash that I have on hand, which isn't always a lot since I don't use cash much, but I want to help lift him up. Yes, I know that plenty of people would argue not to give money; you don't know what they'll do with the money--they could misuse it so give them food instead. I don't know what circumstances that brought him to this point in his life, but I don't want people to lose hope and let circumstances pull them down. Money is a resource--a resource I am willing to share because it always comes back to me). I felt a strong pull to see him that day and bring some positivity to his life. I was so happy when I saw him on the side of the road. Before I could catch him the light turned green. I experienced a brief moment of panic, but then I realized that I had the power to pull over, park, and walk over to him. The idea brought me so much joy. It was a moment of pure clarity. The intersection was extremely busy, but when I walked over, he exclaimed that he hadn't seen me in a while, that he had missed me. He seemed a bit confused as to why I was walking (each time he previously saw me I was driving to work) but was happy to see me, nonetheless. He enveloped me in a huge hug when I brought him money and explained I walked over since the light changed. Moments like that are priceless. There's nothing like bringing true joy to another person. I honestly don't know much about him, but I still want to bring some love, light, and warmth to him.
My positivity high didn't stop there--I went to the grocery store to get a French Silk pie and some chocolate chip cookies for my best friend and her mom; I already made plans to take her mom out to lunch for her birthday Friday afternoon, but it felt right to add some yummy desserts to the mix. April had loved the French Silk pie when she had brought Iris over a few weeks ago; she had even somewhat recently mentioned wishing she had some more (when she saw I brought it over, she exclaimed, "Why must you tempt me so?!?" Aaaaannnndddd she just might have happily eaten two pieces of the pie later that day). I had the impulse to buy the cookies and pie, so I did.
When I arrived at their home, Iris walked up to me, happily woofing; mistakenly thinking she was walking up to me to give me a hug, I reached my arms out only to have her lick my pants. Iris then happily woofed at April and licked April's shirt before woofing again and licking her trampoline. She's developing more and more into a really interesting character (she turned 2 last month; she's always been super smart and verbal, but she just keeps taking it to the next level). I took April's mom out to lunch at Denny's since she wanted to go there, and we had such deep, meaningful conversation. We haven't talked like this in so long (we probably talked for almost 2 hours--mostly about positivity, how to be happy, and how to manifest what you want). Our waitress seemed like she needed some extra love sent her way; she noticed my "Keep Calm and Teach On" shirt and started talking to me about my job. I shared that I was a preschool teacher, which brought her to the subject of her child. She explained that they were 3 and that she had started working at Denny's five days ago to provide for her child for the holidays. She ended with her child not being potty or bed trained. I replied that it was alright. She looked confused and commented, "I keep waiting for you to lecture me." I replied, "Why should I lecture you? There are kiddos at my school that aren't potty trained yet. A lot of those who aren't want to be like all their friends that are potty trained--they want to be big kids, too. Everyone has their own journey, though. Everyone does things in their own time. There's no need to rush." She seemed shocked speechless. She was a truly friendly soul. I realized that for her to feel like I needed to lecture her means that time and time again, person after person lectured her about her child's development and her parenting. That leaves no one feeling good, though. Sending love is what's important--it leaves everyone feeling great and happy. Since I felt the impulse that she needed extra love, I tipped her essentially the price of our meal. It felt so good to share love and joy with others.
We then returned to pick up April and Iris and go shopping. At the store, I found the lavender bubble bath I had been looking for. I also found some reusable sticker-like sheets that had planets (more goodies for my space-loving friend in after care). By keeping my energy and frequency high, I found what I was looking for. As we were leaving the parking lot, we found an unusual site: a car parked atop a large snow pile (it was leftover from the snow storms that gave us snow days earlier this week and likely from the snowplows coming through the parking lot). The absurdity of it all (we honestly didn't remember it when we arrived) left us all laughing. We returned to their home, and April and her mom savored some French Silk pie. We went to the mall, where I got a free pretzel, and April and her mom found some super sales on some pants and a sweater (80% off). We went to Chick-fil-A, where April found a heart-shaped french fry (the universe sent her love), and we went to Michaels to get art supplies to create art over winter break. I could definitely see them become happier and happier as the day continued. They were positive, and thus more positivity found its way to them. We had so much fun, and spirits were so high.
Upon arriving home (after spending 10 hours with April, her mom, and Iris), I found a book (PUUUNG's book) I ordered Sunday night had arrived; it was supposed to take 1-2 weeks to arrive, but arrived within 5 days. Things keep working out for me. I spent my day having fun with loved ones, got goodies for others, I received free things. Honestly, after all of that I felt pretty darn invisible and happy, like nothing could stop me now.
It didn't stop with the conclusion of Friday. It persisted on Saturday. With my intent and fulfillment of putting all of Abraham Hicks' insight into practice, time and time again things fall into place. I am able to manifest my thoughts and desires into reality. A lot of it had to do with my mom. For starters, my mom had been complaining about how she couldn't find the cookies my great grandma had mentioned she wanted on Thanksgiving. My great grandma had launched the rocket of desire for the anise cookies, so my mom couldn't forget about how my great grandma used to eat those cookies every Christmas and how she wanted to get them for her. She kept going on about how IF she found the cookies, she'd give them to my great grandma for Christmas. Her desire to give my great grandma something meaningful kept getting blocked by her perception of lack. I tried to gently push her into a mindset of possibility; I kept emphasizing how WHEN she found the cookies, she would give them to her. She'd respond, "Well, I might not find anise cookies. I'm just being a realist." That mindset did not serve her; settling for "how things are" and being a "realist" is one way many people seem to be living (honestly, it wasn't that long ago that I lived that way, not realizing that it doesn't have to be this way), but you can be the CREATOR of your reality. I told her that she could find the cookies and repeated that WHEN she found them, she WOULD give them to great grandma for Christmas. Lo and behold, what happened? My dad mentioned a bakery that might have them (many of them around us have closed). She then called that bakery. Guess what? They had the cookies. We picked them up from the bakery with ease. If we continued to look at what is, the lack of finding the cookies, she never would have found the anise cookies. We wouldn't have thought to look at the bakery my dad remembered. My mom's mindset focused on the problem rather than finding a solution. My focusing on WHEN she found them and mindset of there being a solution allowed the seed to be planted--my dad then remembered the bakery, and the rest fell into place.
Similarly, we went to the grocery store to pick up things for Christmas lunch and dinner (we're going to our in-laws' house for Christmas lunch with my dad's side of the family and hosting Christmas dinner with my mom's side of the family). She went to look for rolls (to bring to lunch and have for dinner); she got all bent out of shape since she was unable to find the rolls. Sure, there were other rolls in the aisle, but they weren't the ones she wanted. She found me and kept going on about how she looked and looked--they were nowhere. I told her we would find them; she responded that she already checked everywhere. I looked anyway. I wasn't stopped by her mindset of lack. We put the energy out there, the desire for the rolls, so I knew we'd find it. True, the end display and shelves did not have the ones she wanted. She was not mistaken on that account. That fact, that problem, became her reality. I kept looking and found a cart full of unopened boxes of rolls yet to be placed on the shelves. What rolls did those boxes hold? The rolls she wanted. The rolls she wanted were manifested by desire. We found an employee to open the boxes so she could get all the rolls she wanted.
While there at the grocery store, we looked for a gift for our in-laws for hosting Christmas lunch. My mom wanted to give them something that was alive, so we browsed the floral department. She liked the boxes/containers for some of the arrangements but not the arrangements. She liked some of the arrangements but not their containers. She really wanted a decorative box/container. I saw glitter poinsettias and felt the pull of source energy--the impulse and inspiration of manifestation. Those glitter poinsettias lacked the kind of box/container she wanted, but an idea had already began to grow. I explained that we could create our own box for them, we could add a ribbon, it would look great, etc. My mom wasn't tuned in, turned on, tapped in to the vortex like I was. She got all irked and asked why I kept saying "we." She then said that my sister should make the arrangement/box but that she wouldn't because she wouldn't want to (my sister works in the floral department of another store, among other departments). Again, she was focusing on lack and negativity. While she didn't seem convinced, she went along with my idea and got the glitter poinsettias. On the drive home she thought there might be a box to use for them at home. She checked and couldn't find one. While she went out, I checked out Michaels to look for a solution. I found a nice seasonal basket on sale for $5 and got gold ribbon for $2.50. I assembled a pretty sweet basket if I do say so myself. My mom doubted, but she really likes what I created. I knew it would work out. She focused on "reality" and the lack rather than what could be; I ignored what is in favor for creating my own reality. It's true that you can manifest anything and that one person in the vortex is more powerful than many who are not. The rest of my day kept looking up; I got gas for $1.95 a gallon (cheapest it's been in a long time), lights kept changing green for me as I approached them, my sister switched work hours for tomorrow so we can do my birthday dinner (she kept having late shifts), I got three picture frames for the price of one (they were buy one get two free at Michaels), my best friend reached out to me about getting together tomorrow, etc.
I'm so grateful to be alive, to be able to share love and joy with others, and to be coming to this turning point in my growth and development. I'm grateful to be able to change the reality for those around me, to help them stop limiting themselves with what they see (because it seems a lot of the time it's only the problem). Perceiving the world and life this way, however, is a disservice. It does not help you at all. Always choose joy. Always choose happiness. Don't get too entangled in what you "should" do. Do what you want to do. You won't regret it. Besides, your life depends on it. Live it to the fullest!