I hope everyone is doing well, that energies are treating you kindly, and that any students that are on break now are enjoying their summer. This week has been kind of all over the place; there's been times full of relaxation and fun and then some weirdness with heaviness/pressure, struggles with sleep, conflict, tornados, etc. I suppose that's life in general, though. Hopefully, this week hasn't been too crazy for you all and that anyone dealing with the cicadas hasn't struggled to much with noise sensitivities (they've been crazy loud this year and assaulting people with their swarms... it's been a bit rough). I hope you all have been able to make time for joy, laughter, the people/things you love, and self-care. Life's too short to not make the most of the journey and enjoy it.
Sleep has been fairly better this week, but dream recall was fairly elusive in the beginning of the week. Makes me wonder if there were no dreams those nights, if my brain viewed them as insignificant and unworthy of being remembered, or if I just simply didn't remember them (or maybe some sort of combination). Kind of seems like any of those options was feasible, so who knows. Kind of wish I hadn't remembered all of my dreams this week, though.
I awoke from sleep Wednesday morning really unnerved and uncomfortable with a feeling of being unsafe. From what I could recall, there was some kind of group of young students (maybe around preteen age). From the looks of it, one might have claimed that they were “just using their imaginations to play a game,” but it did not feel that way at all. There seemed to be health bars and as if they were actually taking damage; the reason someone might claim that it was “just a game” was because there were no items or visible attacks or anything; the students were saying what they were doing much like little kids do when using their imaginations. It was not lighthearted, though. They would be calling out attacks, like that they were shooting flamethrowers, shooting guns, setting off traps, etc. Not sure where the health bars came from, but it was blatantly obvious that they were depleting. It seemed to be some sort of competition in attempts of “being the best.” There was one girl that ended up going up to a small group of students that was doing well in the “game,” and she said that she gave them gifts like moccasins. It freaked the students out—I’m not sure if it was just because they were convinced it was a trap or they weren’t sure how to take genuine kindness (but the girl seemed sincere).
I guess the competition/game ended or whatever, and one of the boys was taking it really hard (honestly, the whole vibe of the place seemed weird and felt off—seemed sort of like a deserted mall). He went off to the bathroom I think, and I got the feeling that if he went alone, he would never come back out (and it was super chilling and unsettling). One of the boys that did extremely well offered to go check on him, out of genuine concern. The guy in charge (maybe their teacher but that doesn’t quite feel right) gave him the go ahead, so he went to check on the other boy. Said boy was not in a good place and seemed to be breaking psychologically; he seemed to be on the verge of suicide, being unable to take doing poorly on the assessment or whatever it was, while simultaneously shifting the blame with intense anger. When he saw the boy that had done well, something seemed to have broken in him, and he had murderous intent. The other boy wanted to calm him down, but he seemed to become not himself, as if he were possessed. He ended up bashing the other boy’s head in on the sink countertop. Once he realized what he had done, he was horrified and absolutely terrified. The other boy did not seem to really be there (physically was, but like conscious soul was detached maybe?), so he went off to get help, having no idea what to do.
He was breaking down, sobbing, when the so-called teacher found him. In tears, he urged him to help the other boy while wailing that the “teacher” had said he was a good person/good boy. He exclaimed, “How can I be good when I do something like that? I don’t even know why I did!” The “teacher” kind of patted him on the shoulder and gave him a creepy smile, telling him not to worry and that he’d take care of things while remarking, “Who ever said that I was good?” Not entirely certain, but the “teacher” seemed kind of similar to the being pretending to be human in my other dream that looked like a man with a brown ponytail and glasses. Not sure if they were the same, but this “teacher” was definitely not human.
The ”teacher” had “fixed” the situation, but it got so bad. Seemed like he had possessed and merged with the young boy; he came out looking like a youngish adult Jim Carrey, but it came out looking all wrong. It looked flat (kind of like it was 2-D or made out of paper but not quite like that) and was very glitchy. This “Jim Carrey” was very unnerving and seemed to be doing all sorts of things to “put people at ease” by bringing “good things,” but the “good things” seemed very twisted, unnatural, and unsettling. He started singing “Friend Like Me” from Aladdin, and it just made things feel even more wrong. There were elephants and such parading around the place, but it seemed more as a way to capture people, especially people that were unsuspecting.
This one little girl was on an upper level and desperate to get away. She didn’t want to draw attention to herself and was doing her best to stay hidden while trying to figure out a way out. She stumbled upon this tiny shop in a corner with these two young men running the place; they had no idea about what was going on below. She warned them and asked if they had a way out. Turns out, they had a back door that led to the outside, but it was in this kind of creepy looking place that somewhat resembled a small cave; she’d have to climb up this cave-like staircase, and she was somewhat afraid of it. One of the guys was willing to go with her, but she was torn between hiding in the cave-like place and actually going outside. She felt that there was a decent chance of getting caught no matter what she did because the being seemed to be almost all-knowing and one step ahead of everyone (most people didn’t even seem to notice that there was something very wrong with it and believed what it said). Not sure if she made it to safety or not because then I woke up.
There was a dream seeming to involve school. There was this pair of students that wanted to discuss serious matters (but it was unrelated to school--no idea what the matters were), and they ended up bribing their teacher with a bunch of desserts and pancakes to let them go discuss them. The teacher said that they would have three hours to discuss them without issue. They went to discuss whatever it was. Then there was something about this other small group roaming the halls and trying to catch a bus/train? Not sure why a school would have that. I think they were trying to reach the library. Maybe work on a group project or something. Not really sure. There were these girl students fawning over how cute the autistic boy I babysit/tutor was, and his younger brother seemed somewhat annoyed by it (sort of in a sense of "you wouldn't think so if you had to live with him" kind of vibe). The younger brother seemed to want to sneak into some kind of off limits area that had kitchen stuff and kilns for ceramics. No idea why.
There was something about being in the halls of a school (kind of resembled the middle school I used to go to, but I'm not sure if it was supposed to be it). Didn't really seem like people were attending classes, and there were plenty of students/people out in the halls. They all seemed obsessed with collecting and trading Pokémon cards. Not sure specifically why. Someone came up to me, wanting to trade, and telling me that I needed to bring my entire deck with me wherever I went. I think I happened to have a small amount with me for some reason, but I gave them a look and remarked, "I have two binders full of cards; there's no way I'm bringing them everywhere I go." The person seemed impressed. There was something about a student being dressed up in some make-shift costume for some odd creature and making weird noises by using tubes and stuff (no idea why). More might have happened, but that's all I could remember upon waking up.
Dream recall was a complete blur when I woke up Friday morning, but that could be because I didn't sleep that well. No idea why, but I woke up early and couldn't fall back asleep. It was odd. Sleep was somewhat better when I woke up on Saturday morning, but I still had some issue staying asleep. Dream recall was hazy, too, but I could remember bits and pieces. There was something about a beach and some kind of cliff for this secret shortcut to get somewhere. There was also something about going on a walk with a group of people; I know April's mom was there, and I think April was one of the other people there. Her mom was cold, bundled up in blankets. We seemed to be walking towards the park in the evening. This guy was carrying some empty trash can, and he offered to let April's mom get inside it so she could remain warmer. April's mom refused and got upset at the thought. More happened, but details were elusive.
Sleep was pretty iffy last night/this morning. I just wasn't feeling sleepy and like I wanted sleep. Took quite some time to fall asleep. Then I kept waking up without knowing why, and once awake the struggle to fall asleep would commence once more. Kind of felt like I needed more sleep, but after over an hour of struggling to sleep due to extremely loud noises from other people, I gave up. Dream recall was fairly hazy, but I could remember bits and pieces of it. There was something about like a wedding reception; it was small and rescheduled (not sure who it was for). A handful of people were invited, but not many would show up. The girl was in this really big, golden dress. One of the few people who showed up arrived in a golden tux. Maybe it was a friend or relative? Not sure what the deal was. There was something about this dad having his baby/toddler son on his back, who ended up having a diaper explosion and soaking his pants; apparently, it was some video that went viral. There was also something about Tsuki playing in her cat litter but it being more like water, having her "slosh" it around. I have no idea what it all means.
The boys were excited for a relaxing start to summer break; it sounded like they had a fun Memorial Day at the start of the week. Otherwise, they were eager to share memes with me (like Beezus), chat about their favorite games and shows, play with their dogs, and share funny videos. The younger brother was discussing some guy that had a zoom court call to discuss whether he could get his driver's license reinstated; apparently, the man decided to be driving while on the call, and the judge and jury were shocked at the gall of it all. Not really sure how they find things like this, but they always have interesting stories to share. The autistic boy also had a swim meet on Friday, and he did really well; he earned a gold and silver medal for his individual events, and he had gotten his team into first place when he started the relay (but apparently his teammates kind of dropped the ball). Here's hoping they can enjoy the rest of their summer break!
As per usual, Tsuki was her typical goofy, adorable self. She enjoyed plenty of cozy cat naps, sprawling out across the floor, chilling in her cat house, relaxing on her favorite chair, cuddling with me, lounging on her window shelf, snoozing on the back of the couch, lurking, engaging in sneak attacks as well as antics and shenanigans, spying on bugs, birds, and other critters from the window, and then some. Tsuki did come to hang out in the basement while we dealt with tornados. She was a bit confused with my change in schedule, but she's still happy to have me home when I'm available. It was a pretty chill week, and she enjoyed herself.
Artwork for the week included more diamond art:
This week I created more new content for Creativity Chronicles, so feel free to check out the newest content!
New Creativity Chronicles' articles included:
As the rollercoaster of life brings its ups and downs, ebbs and flows, peace and conflict, remember to take care of yourself. Self-care doesn't have to look the same every single day; some days you may require more TLC and rest than others, and that's okay. You don't have to do it all, nor do you have to do it all on your own. It's okay to request and need help and support from others; you're only human. We're all works-in-progress with strengths, skills, talents, areas of struggle, and areas for growth. Nobody is a master at everything, so it's okay if things are a challenge and if you don't have all the answers. Just do you best, keep moving forward step by step, and you'll see improvement overtime. Somedays it may feel like you're going nowhere fast, but give yourself time. Your timing doesn't have to be like everyone else's; you might have been planted and need time to grow before you start being able to see results. It's okay; there's no need to rush. You've got this! You matter. The world is better with you here in it, so don't give up. You mean the world to someone, even if you don't realize it, so keep being authentically you and shining your light! Have a wonderful rest of your weekend!
Food for thought for the week included:
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