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Writer's pictureJessica

Spring Rejuvenation

Spring is definitely here; it's been absolutely beautiful. I love all the blooming flowers (the backyard is a sea of green and purple with all of the small wildflowers). The weather is gorgeous while simultaneously supplying the needed rainfall for rebirth and new growth. I'd like to wish a happy birthday to my great grandma, who turned 101 today! I hope you enjoyed your special day! Plus, Fluffy cat and I have spent a great deal of time outdoors, soaking up the sunshine and fresh air.


Fluffy cat has enjoyed herself this week, sunbathing, exploring, snoozing, cuddling, and being her adorable self. She decided to get her face all dirty, though, by rubbing herself on a grill. She's such a goof.


I had lots of fun with April and Iris this week! We went to four different parks as well as the botanical gardens. Iris created a "camp fire" in the mulch and had me roast some marshmallows with her. It was pretty cute; she picked out our roasting sticks and everything. April wanted to stop by the store, and Iris was authentically Iris, finding box homes for little packets and later proclaiming, "I'm a cone hand!" At one of the parks she decided to provide a bed for a dandelion (said bed being her shoe lol). She also loved tossing rocks into the pond. She loved watching the tiny fish swim around by the rice at the botanical gardens, and she was super gung-ho about leaving footprints everywhere after stepping in puddles. She's full of pure energy, constantly on the move, and so sweet. She easily makes friends. One of her new friends was a boy a couple of years older than her; he asked what her name was. After hearing that it was Iris, he exclaimed, "Iris?? I haven't heard that name in CENTURIES!!" When his babysitter prompted him to tell Iris his name, he announced, "My name is C-O-O-P-E-R!" While Iris is an extremely smart cookie, I'm fairly certain the spelling went over her head. They were super cute together. Iris became sad when it was time to leave (it was getting rather close to dark), and Cooper kept coming over to say goodbye to her in attempts to make her feel better. Honestly, kids are so pure--they're the bright light of the future. It soothes my soul to be around them and witness their authentic kindness (plus, they tend to be rather humorous). For example while we were driving to pick up her grandma from her eye appointment, Iris kept showing me her drawings. All of a sudden she declared, "It's a hairball on a tooth!" and then continued to draw hairball after hairball. She would then hand her magnetic doodler to me so I could draw a hairball on a tooth, too. My drawings weren't up to her standards, though (lol) as, apparently, they were too big, too small, or just didn't look right. I honestly got a kick out of it, though. She had also been carrying around a feather and told me to hold onto it. I decided it would look nice in her hair and impulsively stuck it in. She touched one side of her pony tail, didn't feel it, and decided that the feather must not be in. The feather never fell out, either (which I was impressed since I had a split second to put it in and since she has so much energy). Iris is such a character, and I'm super grateful to have her and April in my life. I adore them so!



Here are this week's Perler projects; I added some new buddies to my InuYasha collection. It's been lots of fun! I plan on creating all of the main gang. Are there any characters or color schemes you'd like to see me play with?


This week's fanfic includes Kagome's Trial and Work Problems. I really enjoyed Kagome's Trial; it was interesting to see the scenario play out where the spirit of Touga essentially haunts Kagome (it had me thinking of Nappa haunting Vegeta in Dragon Ball Z Abridged lol). While I wouldn't wish all the turmoil and suffering on Kagome, the transpiring events definitely spurred on a lot of growth and healing for characters involved. It definitely resonated with the concept of there being no accidents or coincidences in the universe. It also pointed out that fear literally inhibits happiness and prevents us from stepping into our true power. Fear is such a limiter; things could have played out so differently if characters hadn't listened to the doubts and scenarios fear convinced them of. Granted, since everything happens for a reason, fear served a purpose, but it definitely isn't the guiding force we should be listening to if we want to be authentic and serve our true purpose. Similarly, I watched Say "I Love You" this week, and it exhibited similar themes. Mei is originally convinced that people can't be trusted as she had been betrayed by so-called friends early on in her life. She believes that she doesn't need anyone and that she is fine on her on. To a point this is true. If you don't let anyone in, it's quite difficult for them to hurt you. She may be fine living this way, but I don't think anyone could argue that she's actually happy this way or thriving by any means. It was more that she was existing, going through the motions every day. Say "I Love You" illustrates how while people can hurt you, people can also heal you and bring greater happiness than you can even imagine. It's freaking adorable, and I can see why Corliss insisted I watch it. So many characters go through intense growth and healing. Megu's persona definitely rubbed me the wrong way--it felt so fake. Sure, she was exuding the whole "nice girl" routine, but it felt rather off-putting. Turns out, it was very much an act; she wore that mask because she wanted people to like her. It resulted in plenty of people using her, though; the one true friend who continuously tried to look out for her was often brushed off by Megu until Megu reached her breaking point and realized that the people that matter aren't bothered by one's authentic self while those that are bothered by it don't matter. Say "I Love You" demonstrates time and time again the importance of finding genuine friends and loved ones, that you shouldn't give up just because one attempt ended in failure; if you give up and stop looking, you will never find them. They could be right in front of you all along, but if you don't let them in, you will never know. Those that matter will loyally have your back and look out for your best interests. They may unintentionally hurt you every now and then as we are all humans that are learning and growing, but true bonds are never so fragile that a few bumps in the road will shatter them. There may be challenges and struggles, but those bonds will encompass true love (whether it be of the friendship/soul-sibling, family, or romantic variety). Those that truly care for you will never abandon you. If someone does abandon you, it is a learning experience (and frankly, it's probably better for them to exit your life sooner rather than later; if they abandon you, they never had your best interest in mind). These experiences can be painful at times, but in the long run they're worthwhile and life-altering.


April feels like a really powerful month full of rejuvenation and rebirth. I've been involved in deep discussions with my friends, and lots of profound conclusions are being reached. People are reaching their breaking points where they refuse to settle for less than they want any longer. We are rethinking how we live and what calls the shots (i.e. if we are doing things out of mere obligation or because we "should" rather than genuinely feeling the pull to do so). Granted, we feel that our word should mean something, but agreeing to plans can end up feeling like heavy chains if we're not feeling up to it when the moment occurs. I remember back in October Corliss was going to need a ride, and she made her request a few weeks in advance. Normally, I would agree because I love helping others, but something felt unsure about agreeing. It was like this subtle nudge that I shouldn't agree; Corliss was fine with finding a ride otherwise; she didn't want to pressure me into doing something. Day of when I would have been giving her a ride came around, and I felt severely drained with some rather painful cramps. I would have felt awful about cancelling on her last minute if I had agreed to driving her, so I was rather grateful that I hadn't agreed. That would have felt so heavy trying to back out or actually going through with it despite how I terrible I felt. That way of going about things isn't going to cut it any longer. I feel like the energies are just getting lighter and lighter, and that way of life won't actually work--like the energies will literally prevent it or have it blow up in our faces. I discussed these thoughts with my friends, especially since they had things come up/ran late for some of our meetups. I could feel their stress/shame through their messages, but I just chilled in my car rather happily with the InuYasha soundtrack. It honestly didn't bother me, and I informed them as such. I think they were quite relieved to find out because people tend to take stuff personally. They weren't late to spite me or anything--life happens, and things come up. I had no where I had to be--my plans were to spend time with them. It didn't seem worth it to rile myself it; such an action just feels so heavy, and I don't like it. It's just so uncomfortable. I'm so grateful I've reached this point; I've made so much progress from the programming from my mom about needing to be early for everything. That mindset is so stressful. Granted, I still tend to be timely, but time feels like an illusion so I don't let it dictate my actions. I feel like we're all learning, growing, healing, and evolving so much right now. It feels like we're breaking through wall after wall, soaring ever-higher. It's pretty awesome. Granted, some of the process on the way up can be unpleasant and painful, but to be able to breathe easily and be at peace? Absolutely worth it. Stay well and stay blessed with love and light, everyone~


Here's a powerful song from Fearless Soul:



Here's some food for thought to consider from Ralph Smart on Infinite Waters:


Here's some food for thought for the week:

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