I hope everyone is doing well! The energy has been building lately with this supercharged astrological event. May 26th was a super moon (meaning the moon is the closest to the Earth in its orbit), it's a blood moon (meaning the sun's rays are partially blocked by the earth, creating a red/orange appearance), it's a full moon, and it's a total lunar eclipse. It's quite the unique event. Did anyone witness this special astrological event? I got up early in hopes to view it in person, but once I walked outside I found the early morning sky covered in clouds. It was disappointing, but I was able to watch the eclipse/super blood moon online, which was pretty neat. I included some informational videos and meditations below if you're interested:
I had some interesting dreams starting around the full moon/lunar eclipse. The morning of the full moon/eclipse I woke up not recalling all of the specifics of the dream but knowing that it involved Corliss. Some of her nieces and nephews were there, too. We were planning a trip I think (her nieces and nephews all wanted to hang out with us, but Corliss wanted it to be just the two of us). I'm pretty sure we were planning/discussing things in Emily/Drew's room (back when it still had the 2 beds). Corliss was sitting on one of the beds with a couple of her nieces and nephews. I think they were eating pancakes, and she pulled out a paper with things we could do. One thing she had written down was the name of one of her friends that had an open invitation to come visit and stay over. Corliss really wanted us to go on a trip. I kind of feel like more happened, but the details are fuzzy. I was driving somewhere right before I woke up, but I don't recall where (although I'm pretty sure I was getting off some exit from the highway). Turns out Corliss had a somewhat similar dream that night/morning. Her dream was being on a road camping trip. It was with 5 guys, and it was partially a scavenger hunt. She suspects her dream was partially her brain digesting the show she's been watching and partially her brain saying "no more single Pringle."
The following night/morning a lot seemed to happen in my dream with multiple transitions. I don’t remember all the details, but here’s what I remember. The first part seemed similar to Space Jam. There were two teams (pretty sure they were supposed to play basketball in the dream, but I did not see them actually playing). The opposing team had lots of players (and I’m pretty sure that team had the Looney Tunes on it). The team I was talking to only had 3 players. There were strange rules. One rule was that players had to alternate between rivals on the opposing team. When a player was your rival, you were supposed to talk smack and focus on them I think (at least that's my understanding of what I was being told in the dream). The player I was talking to seemed like Michael Jordan (but I’m not sure if it was actually him). He was miffed and didn’t want to go along with the rules, specifically the rival one. His rival before the new switch was apparently Daffy Duck, and he took it very seriously. He questioned me if I would go along with their rules if he had been pulled from the last 3 games and couldn’t face off against his important rival. I understood where he was coming from; I proposed that he “go along” with the rule, switching rivals, but still keeping his competitive streak with Daffy, just leaving out the smack talk and what not—like trying your best against Daffy, trying to beat him, but having it be more under the radar and not following the game’s traditional rules of a rival. He seemed to consider this and seemed to feel it was acceptable. I feel like more happened, but I don’t remember anything else from this part of the dream.
I think the next part was that I was sharing a room with my sister again. Why, I couldn’t say. It was the middle of the night, and my parents had been sleeping but woke up for whatever reason. Even though I shared a room with Emily again, I don’t remember her being in the dream. I feel like something was happening, but I don't recall much from this part of the dream.
It transitioned to the middle of the ocean. I was alone (but not scared or anything). Giant waves kept coming at me, one after another. Regardless of how massive the wave, I was always able to stay above water. I remember there easily being dozens upon dozens of waves that just kept coming one after another, but none were able to faze me.
I think I then ended up back at home. I think I wanted to sleep and was trying to find my blanket. I looked up at the ceiling and noticed some kind of critter. It seemed sort of like a dragonfly, but it was no “normal” dragonfly (if that indeed was what it was). It was translucent and didn’t have much color (if it had color, it was more to accent details; the bulk of it was clear). I think it ended up dying; I don’t remember how it got off the ceiling and onto the blanket. It’s not like it fell; its "death" (if that's what was actually happening) was more of a bubbling, kind of like molten glass.
The dream transitioned to sort of a super hero theme. I think Emily was in it at this point as like Elastigirl. I don’t remember what was going on exactly, but there was something involving like air brushing/spray painting parts of costumes. The Elastigirl character was miffed because she thought I broke the color applicator or something. She was trying to get a yellow star on her cheek (not sure why). I informed her that it wasn’t broken—it was just low on color. I got a red applicator or switched it to red (not entirely sure which) and showed her that it still worked. I ended up giving her a red square on her cheek instead of the yellow star she wanted. Not sure why, but that's what happened.
The dream then switched to a galactic theme. There was some sort of galactic being (I don’t think they had the best intentions, but I don’t remember much from this part). The being had white skin if I recall correctly (like literal snow-white skin, not the peachy “white” humans have when they proclaim they have “white” skin) and blue eyes. This being wanted to find this group of galactic entities that had hidden from their home planet. I think they group had fled to Earth (possibly to get away from this galactic being). It seemed like they all coexisted in some kind of apartment complex/group lodging. The galactic being seemed to have cornered some sort of family in the hallway of wherever the galactics were staying. You could tell that all the rooms were glowing as light was seeping from the closed door cracks into the hallway. The family were part of the group and informed the white-skinned galactic being that he wouldn’t be able to find them (I think that the light was the others teleporting off the planet). The white-skinned galactic sort of seemed to be threatening/trying to persuade the family, but it didn’t work. I’m not sure what his intentions were. The family didn’t seem scared in the least (in a universe-has-my-back-I’m divinely-protected kind of way). I don’t remember anything else happening; the next thing I remember is waking up.
When I woke up Friday morning, I recalled my dream starting off with an InuYasha/YashaHime theme. I think Rin and Kagome were doing something at first, but I don’t recall exactly what. I do remember the part with Sesshomaru better. At one point noticed that something happened to Towa’s clothes, and he offered her his outer shirt (the traditional flower crest one). She ended up taking it (because her clothes were either fairly destroyed or just missing). He then offered another shirt layer, which happened to be all red (but I think it was a deeper, darker red than InuYasha’s robe of the fire rat), to someone else, who was in a similar position as Towa (could have been Setsuna, Rin, or even Kagome—not sure exactly who it was). I think something else happened in between what I remember. The next thing I remember was Moroha and Setsuna were plotting a way to get Towa alone with Sesshomaru for what seemed like bonding time. I’m pretty sure they were in the forest outside the village. Moroha and Setsuna came up with excuses on why they had to leave and left Towa alone. I think they realized that’s the only way Sesshomaru would show up (I’m pretty sure that they knew he was kind of “lurking” nearby). It seemed like Sesshomaru wanted to bond with Towa but that he had no idea how to effectively go about doing so. He ended up taking Towa to Kaede’s hut. He stayed for a bit, but he seemed to leave when she fell asleep. She woke up in the middle of the night to find him gone (she seemed to know that it wasn’t because he was upset or because he was abandoning her or anything) but noticed a trail in the dirt like he had intentionally dragged a sword or stick in the dirt so she could find him. He didn’t say much in the dream (as per usual for Sesshomaru), but Towa seemed able to understand what his few words and actions truly meant.
The dream transitioned to me being at a store like Target with Emily, my parents, and Iris. I guess we were there just to shop. Iris was excited. She got upset for some reason while we were there and wanted to run around the store. She was crying, and I knew I had to help calm her down. I got down to her level and started doing some deep breathing. She noticed, starting to calm down and stop crying, and then started mirroring the deep breaths. When we finished, she seemed a lot happier, and she stuck to me like glue, following me around akin to a duckling. We ended up checking out various sections with my family. My mom was in the greeting card section, picking out cute cards with cats (she was accumulating quite the handful of cards). Iris found one she loved. We went towards the art section with Emily. Emily was looking for a very specific book that apparently could only be found there. I think she got either the last or second to last copy. It was about constellations/astrology. The cover was stunning—it was a bright metallic turquoise-blue with many stars. I think it also featured a horse or unicorn (could be in a constellation fashion or merely the animal—I don’t recall which). We traveled around the store some more and kept seeing staff blocking off part of the path. I thought it was a bit strange. We kept seeing them—it almost felt like they were everywhere. Apparently, someone had puked all over the store’s carpets. It was in sections all over the store. It looked like it was over only for more staff to appear, warding people away from the soiled carpets. Someone had done a lot of purging. We ended up in the baby/toddler section. Iris was looking at toys next to me. My dad started laughing. When I asked what was so funny, he pointed out how a guy in a different section (maybe the electronics/movie section?) now had to drink juice because he opened it wrong. When I looked, I saw the man holding a juice box, looking perturbed. The juice box had one (possibly two) holes towards the bottom, causing a stream of juice to leak out.
The dream transitioned again. The setup was basically the same as the store, but it was now also like a school. My former coworker, Carla, was there, and we were with the Toucan class. The preschoolers were playing with paint—I think they were creating finger paintings. I was ensuring that the kiddos had the paint they needed (specifically the preschooler from my dream last week with the super curly, brown hair at the time) and while I was doing so, his mom got upset that I didn’t say hi to her. She stopped me greeting me and then remarking, “You know, I was right there, and you didn’t say hi to me.” I informed her that I was getting more paint for the kids. I had to go to a different aisle to get it. As I left, I could overhear some of the parents and other teachers smack-talking me—they were talking as if I didn’t care about other people and as if I was a horrible person. I think their words bothered me a bit, but I didn’t get upset. I remember being rather calm about the whole thing. I sort of took a detour in a different aisle upon my return to bring paint back, but it was so they could see me coming (kind of like a you-know-what-you-did thing). I gave the little boy the paint he needed and basically gave the smack-talkers the silent treatment. He broke out in a beautiful smile just for me; I could feel that he sincerely appreciated me. The class was nearing the end, and he needed more paint once again. I think technically I wasn’t supposed to get him more paint (since I think the class was like seconds away from ending), but I decided to get him the green fluffy paint he wanted so he could take it home with him. I went to look for a container to put it in since it wasn’t right there in the spot the class was taking place at. The part of the store I wound up in was similar to the Art Studio at the local children’s museum I used to volunteer at, but it was different in appearance. I’m pretty sure it was supposed to be the Art Studio/Maker’s Workshop, though. A boy who had been a 5th grader from student teaching stopped me in my quest to find a container because he was looking for paper he could use. I told him he could find it at the Art Studio (it was in the section across the way), and he tried to rip a piece out of a sketchbook/paper pad that was right in front of us that was for sale by the store. I stopped him and showed him the Art Studio so he wouldn’t get in trouble with the store. I then went back to searching for a container for the preschooler. Carla came up to me with the boy and his mom because they were ready to leave. Carla asked where the containers were since she had never been there before (she commented that she only knew where they were in her classroom). I noted on how they had remodeled the space over the last year or so, so I wasn’t sure exactly where they were and was looking for them. When I found them I went to give it to the little boy so he could paint at home only for his mom to inform me that she already took care of it (she seemed to improvise with a container he had in his backpack/lunchbox for snack). They left. I was then bombarded with hugs and cries of my name from kids from before/after care and student teaching. They mobbed me, proclaiming how much they missed me. One little girl asked if I remembered her, to which I instantly replied, “Of course, you’re Elle.” She lit up, giving me the largest, brightest smile I’ve ever seen. They all seemed to soak up my presence—they beamed. It was almost like they had been craving my presence for so long; they were so excited to finally see me again. I then woke up.
Many things happened in my dream from Friday night/Saturday morning, but I don’t recall what the beginning and middle were; what I do remember started with a Simpsons theme. I think something had happened to Homer (like he went missing?) because Bart seemed to be missing him. I’m a little bit fuzzy on what happened next, but I do recall Nelson and another boy (possibly Martin? It’s been so long since I’ve seen the show; the last time I saw it was probably when my family went to see The Simpsons Movie, which was back in 2007). The two of them were standing in front of some building. Once they entered it there was a small like lake or pond with a partially submerged boat that resembled the Titanic. Nelson warned the other boy that he didn’t want to go there, but the boy assured him that he knew exactly what he was doing and walking into. The boat had some sort of portal entrance. They ended up walking through the portal and being transferred to the other side. Once inside the setting was similar to the local children's museum main floor near the climbing beanstalk, but there was what seemed to be a concession counter/stand. The dream switched from The Simpsons’ characters to me. At this counter I ended up giving out rations and provisions to people who seemed to be refugees. They were extremely grateful. Someone else was helping me hand out the rations, but I don’t recall who it was. Many families came up to the window, seeking assistance. We didn’t seem to run out of supplies. There were a few kids from before/after care and the preschool that came to hang out at the table, looking for snacks. I ended up giving them some, and they became ecstatic. I’m pretty sure Elle came up to me again, asking if I knew who she was. She seemed happy that I remembered her, but now that I’m awake I’m wondering if she was looking for a different answer than “Elle.” There are no coincidences, and I find it peculiar that this happened two nights in a row with my dreams (at least that I remember—heck, it could have been happening for a while now). Maybe I knew her in a past life, and we’re supposed to be doing some specific task right now. I’m not particularly sure, but I’ll keep my awareness open to any intuition/future dreams that might lead me towards an answer. Corliss commented that it could be a spirit guide since spirit guide are often disguised people we recognize so that we are not frightened of them in their true form. I wouldn't put it past spirit guides to do so. If it is a spirit guide, I wonder what specific message they're trying to convey. It's interesting.
From what I remember upon waking on Sunday morning my dream started off with me walking down a hall. There was some guy there; it seemed like something big was happening. There was some kind of announcement or warning (whether it was broadcasted over an intercom or telepathically, I’m not sure). The guy started panicking. There were two options to pick from to continue. The guy seemed to be hesitating but gravitating towards the route on the right. That route started to shift upwards (akin to an elevator), which freaked the heck out of the guy, and he dove to make it toward that route. I think that route was something akin to remaining on the planet. Since the route on the right no longer seemed to be an option, I calmly walked to the option on the left. It seemed to be going into space. I remember shortly afterwards I found some other people in a room, and gravity got all wonky (like we were in space). It settled down after a while. I started wondering around the place. It sort of seemed like a theme park or mall, but it wasn’t quite those things. I think my dad was there, and he was asking people if they remembered this movie (like where we were currently residing). I continued to wander around, and then it seemed like wherever we were at started experiencing issues. Other people seemed kind of anxious and on edge. I think the pipes and water started getting messed up. One lady came out of what seemed like a maintenance room and was panicking because this sludge-like substance started bursting out of pipes. I think people started to evacuate. I ended up in what seemed to be an indoor playground; it was rather massive and contained a giant tube-climbing-play structure that you can often find smaller versions of in restaurant play places. I started to climb in the play structure, and I think my goal was to show the large number of kids that were climbing in there how to get out and get to safety. I think I realized it was taking too long since the play structure was so massive, so I ended up making my own exit and began to climb down. The kids started following me, but they were scared. The first kid that came out was one of the kids from the preschool I used to work at. He was on the verge of breaking down into tears. I crouched down, opening my arms wide, and let him know that everything was okay—that he was safe. He broke out into a huge smile, running into my arms to receive a hug and comfort that he needed. I reassured him, and I think that I told him that they had a snack (and crypto currency??) waiting for him down the hallway that was behind us. He gave me a giant smile again and happily skipped down the hallway. This process repeated with several more kids before I woke up.
When I told Corliss about my recent dreams, her response was that I need a space to have my own daycare. It's not the first time she's told me about this. She's told me quite a few times. One of the families I would babysit for regularly wanted me to find a way to do a "Parents' Night Out" because they knew I'd be great at it and that there was definitely a market for it. The reason it struggled reaching fruition is due to lack of space for it. I understand that everything happens for a reason, but the student loan debt from the 5 year program to get the dual Bachelors and Masters degrees has put a damper on available finances. I know big things are happening in the next six months/year and half, so I wonder what'll happen in that timeframe for me. I've been feeling the inclination to move, but I'm not sure where. There's a pull to be somewhere a bit more rural, but I haven't experienced any noticeable pull to a specific location. Let me know if you have any suggestions. With all the incoming energies it feels like the big, drastic moves (that some may label as "crazy") will be the ones that actually end up paying off. I look forward to seeing how my story continues.
It's been beautiful this week! The sky and flowers are stunning! Even the rain was beautiful (I appreciated the torrential downpour from the comfort of indoors, and it was quite peaceful watching it from the window).
Fluffy cat has enjoyed outdoor explorations (when it hasn't been raining) and has waited for me on the couch to come home from babysitting. She's also decided that sleeping on the dining room chairs is her new favorite evening/nighttime spot.
I spent part of the week hanging out with the boys; they're happy to have started summer break. Pearl's been hanging out with us, and Thursday afternoon she cuddled with me as a downpour was released from the dark storm clouds. It was a pretty relaxing afternoon, watching the rain as she used me as a pillow, and the boys were playing with their VR set. They enjoy a game called Beat Saber and picked Imagine Dragons' songs. They also had me play with their Sega Genesis. We did Disney karaoke. We partook in Disney trivia and guess-the-character/song/movie quizzes. They had me guess anime characters and guess anime based off of the opening songs (I did pretty well, but there were some I've never seen before). The elder of the two remembered a conversation we had months ago in passing (it might have been in February or March or even back in 2020); when we had gotten to Ouran High School Host Club's opening, he exclaimed, "Hey, that's the show with the twins!" He has an incredible memory; that conversation was just about how Hikaru and Kaoru had a staged fight and dyed their hair to pink and blue. The conversation didn't last very long, but he still remembers it. I thought it was humorous that they know InuYasha now even though they haven't watched more than a few clips of it--during the anime quiz/guessing game, "Change the World" started playing, and they shouted, "It's InuYasha!" It's awesome. The older of the two asked me if InuYasha had a new movie; when I asked what he meant for clarification, he asked if it was called YashaHime. I explained that YashaHime was the sequel to InuYasha rather than a movie. We also discussed anime in general and watched some funny clips from SK8 the Infinity. It was a relaxing week, and I've missed spending quality time with them; this summer is sure to be fun! I still get a bit distracted by a spot on their wood wall; it looks just like a pair of eyes to me--makes me think of an owl or cat.
I hope everyone enjoyed their Memorial Day weekend! I got together with my dad's side of the family this weekend. Some of my relatives from Ohio even came into town. My sister brought her new boyfriend over. My little cousin, Addie, was being super adorable, carrying her cat toy everywhere with her. It was a lovely afternoon outdoors; the weather was gorgeous! The funniest part was likely my little cousin, Jean, being silly with my aunt Kris. Jean (she just graduated from preschool) was laughing at my aunt.
Jean: "I was laughing at your butt. It has a face."
Kris: "My butt? What kind of face?"
Jean: "A grumpy face! It doesn't want to be on you!" *does a swiping motion* "I cut off your butt. *starts to walk away* "I'm putting it in jail."
Kris: "You cut off my butt and are putting it in jail?!"
Jean: *laughs and puts the butt in the playground that's acting as jail*
It was nice to see everyone and enjoy the fresh air and sunshine. I look forward to seeing them again next month at the park to celebrate my aunt's graduation from the doctorate program. When we were getting ready to leave my aunt Angie's house, I noticed the sign she had hanging on her garage wall--the one I made for her years ago, playing off of the inside joke that an alligator stole her ID. It was an awesome little surprise to find on our way out.
Here are the latest goodies I've received; more from Spiritual Supermall Divine $9 goodies and the Goddess Provisions June box arrived! I'm super excited about all these new goodies; I'm probably most excited for the lunar singing bowl and crystal lights from the June box. These stores always have great goodies, though!
Here are the newest art projects; I spent some more time playing with paint. If you have any project recommendations, I'm open to suggestions!
I enjoyed more anime, fanfic, and manga throughout the week. This week's fanfic includes: A Sweet Beginning, Christmas Collection, A Regency Romance, and The Bracelet. I did some catching up with That Time I Got Reincarnated as a Slime manga. The fact that Rimuru ends up embracing being a Demon Lord without changing who he is as an individual is pretty powerful; it aligns with the concept that labels of "good" and "bad" are irrelevant and that it's most important to truly accept who you are/where your life journey takes you. Rimuru could have easily gone down a rocky slope of self-criticism and self-condemnation for where his path led him. It's not accepting ourselves and our circumstances, not accepting the now, that leads to our suffering, but Rimuru accepts his light and shadow. This feels like what the universe is prompting all of us to learn how to do for ourselves.
This week's episode of Fruits Basket truly hit home. It resonates so deeply. So many people feel like Kyo does, being swallowed up by a pit of guilt, shame, hatred, and depression. We blame ourselves for things we did and didn't do. We find ways to cope with the intensity of these wounds and get stuck in playing out the same patterns, often avoiding our pain, running away instead of processing and healing our wounds. These patterns and coping mechanisms often aren't logical, but we cling to them in order to survive the trauma and pain. They started back in childhood, back when we were young and not knowing any other way. We're no longer those small children; we've learned and grown so much since then. The only way to finally overcome our wounds is to be honest and face them so we can begin to heal. If we live in denial and avoidance, running whenever they start to emerge, they always remain, lurking in the darkness and waiting for the opportunity to reappear. No matter how deeply you may bury it, it'll remain. It will reappear one day. It will keep returning until we finally heal.
Kyo begins opening old wounds as he shares his past with Tohru. He shares about how he met Tohru's mother, Kyoko. Like so many of the Somas (and people in our world), Kyo had heavy burdens and traumas even as a small child. Kyo lashed out and decided to blame others (namely Yuki) for his issues.
Child Kyo: "What a jerk! He was already born luckier than me. Why can't he at least let me have this?"
Kyoko: "The bad guy: that's what you want to see. 'Cause if he's not as awful as you think, who do you have left to hate?"
Child Kyo: "Are you kidding?! You're on his side, too! You're saying it's all my fault!?"
Kyoko: "No, I'm not. It's pointless, you know? Labeling good and bad. Taking sides. Don't live your life worrying about that stuff. You understand me? Really, it would be a waste of a good, kind boy like you."
The world isn't black and white. Labeling it as such doesn't do us any favors. By dividing the world into labels of "good" or "bad" limits our understanding of our world--we become unable to see the big picture, the whole story. Spending our time doing so is a waste of our time, like Kyoko informed Kyo--we have kind souls if we allow them to shine their light and not become dimmed and buried by fear, judgment, and hate. When we listen to such thoughts, we end up running away from happiness. Kyo can recognize how he ran away in his past.
Kyo admits, "I never went back [to see Kyoko]. I was lonely because I felt betrayed, ashamed because I couldn't help, and stung because it felt like he had stolen something. Basically, I was sulking. So I avoided seeing her again, but then one day there she was. I was trying to decided whether to say something when I saw it: a car coming towards us out of control. I thought, 'Oh shit! I have to help her! If I grabbed her arm and pulled her back against me... but then I remembered I'm not human. If I caught her in my arms, I'd transform, and people would find out what I am. So instead... I let her die. If I had just pulled her back, then she wouldn't have gone flying. She wouldn't have felt all that pain. I know she'd still be alive... but I didn't. I weighed her life against mine, and I chose me. I protected my secret at the cost of someone's life even though I hate myself. So much. So intensely. So completely. I wish I'd just go away. Disappear for good, and yet in the end I always protect myself. Instead of taking responsibility I run away. Every damn time. Like now. I'm too scared to even look at your face. My mom, she was sent flying, too. That's how she died. Only, it wasn't an accident. She said she felt guilty for giving birth to me, that she pitied me too much to be around me. She was sobbing uncontrollably, and the next day she died... It's my fault. Everything's my fault. Their lives... I stole them. It's true. They both died because of me. Honestly, I almost cried, hearing her say that [sounds lonely] 'cause even if I didn't understand exactly what she meant, I felt forgiven--forgiven for existing by a total stranger. That probably isn't what she intended, but still... I thought Master was the only person in the world who would actually want me around. My mom was always consumed by her fear. My dad had nothing but hatred for me. The Somas looked at me with contempt. I was so used to being rejected. She was like a ray of light, of hope, and then there was Tohru. I wanted to meet her, too. Even so, I only actually went to see her that one time. I watched her, sitting alone in that room, and I didn't like how lonely she looked. I wanted both of them to be happy. I wanted their days to be good ones. I wanted to erase that loneliness. Childish thoughts, they got trapped in my mind, and I found myself thinking, 'Are they lonely today? Are they smiling today?' It was like something bloomed in my chest, and the worry wouldn't go away. So that day for the first time I made the conscious decision to visit--not that it ended well, and when I saw her again... that ending was much worse. She said she wouldn't forgive me. She was lying there in a pool of blood. She noticed me standing nearby and said, 'I won't forgive you.' At least... that's what it sounded like, and then I just stood there frozen. My mind went blank. I couldn't think, couldn't understand. Then something snapped. I ran... After that Master took me away to live in the mountains. I'd fallen into the dark, and I stayed there, trapped. Master tried to get me to keep living, but I was so lost. I couldn't forgive myself for what I'd done. It felt like I deserved to die, and the only way to keep going was to tell myself, 'It's not my fault. Yuki's fault--that's what it is. He's the reason things turned out like this. That rat stole all my hope.' I made it Yuki's fault 'cause it couldn't be mine. I created a bad guy in my mind and made him take responsibility for everything. It wasn't logical. It didn't need to be. I just needed him to be the bad guy. As long as I could make anything inconvenient his fault, I could pretend to forget what happened--as long as I could just keep hating him. I focused on that, my hate, and used it to erase my memory of the day your mom died... because of me... I still can't believe I managed to keep it buried all this time. The other day I saw that hat in your room, and it came flooding back. The memory that I conveniently repressed. The guilt I'd shifted onto somebody else. Figures, my whole life saving my own skin's been the only thing I was ever any good at. Awful, right? Anyway, when I got better, I decided to leave the mountains and use hatred to keep me alive. Master just gave me a sad smile. My dad had told Akito I had dropped off the map, so I was summoned to the main estate when I showed back up. Akito scolded me. We argued, and then we made a bet. 'Before you graduate from high school prove you can defeat Yuki. Win and I'll stop calling you a monster. I'll even welcome you as a true zodiac member.' Maybe I was secretly happy to hear that, not because I wanted to be welcomed into the zodiac but because it fueled my hate. So I went straight to find Yuki. Of course, I never imagined I'd run into you, too... Knowing that, can you forgive me? The guy who ran way--who always runs away. Who never said anything. Who pretended he didn't realize. I was so angry and scared. I didn't mean to get so close to her. I didn't mean to fall in love... and yet, how? I can't forgive me. Your mom was right to say that, and I don't want you to forgive me either. Not now."
These negative emotions will eat us away inside when we allow them to fester. They will drown you if you allow them to. The thing is that these negative emotions aren't the truth. While Kyoko's death could be in part due to Kyo's inaction, it is not ultimately his fault. He did not push her into the street in front of the car. He did not cause the car to drive out of control. He didn't force the driving forces of the accident into action. Yes, he didn't pull her back, which could have saved her. The game of "what if" is not a game we can win, though. Even if he had pulled her back, it wouldn't be guaranteed to save Kyoko. Perhaps she could have become jarred by the sudden movement backwards, tripped, fallen, and still gotten into an accident. Yes, Kyo could have done more in attempt to help, but he didn't kill her. It's not like he ran her over with the car. He didn't shoot her or stab her or push her off a cliff. It's understandable why he feels like he did, but the truth is he didn't kill her. The negative emotions are skewing his perception of the truth. Tohru doesn't let shame, guilt, fear, hatred, and judgment cloud her vision; Tohru remarks, "I won't--is that what you want to hear? What I have to say? Either I forgive you or I don't. Is that what it comes down to? Are those choices the only ones that I have left? I can't believe she'd really tell you that. It doesn't sound like her. Not at all. I can't believe it, but if you're right, if you didn't mishear and that's truly what she said to you, then... then... I know my choice! The only one I can make is to go against mom! Kyo, please! Isn't there any way I can get you to see the truth? To accept the fact that I love you?! And nothing you say will change that!" We have more choices than we might realize; it's not either/or, black or white, good or bad. The truth of the universe is love.
Kyo, still caught up in his emotions and shame for the past, ends up fleeing once again. He isn't ready to let go of the fear, guilt, and shame, so he falls back on his old patterns. He could choose differently; it may require courage and seem impossible to change, but each habit and skill is acquired by choosing to act and then repeating that act over time. Running is easy for Kyo because he's had so much practice fleeing. Kyo berates himself as he thinks, "Pathetic. I was completely selfish. I confessed my own sins. Said everything I wanted to say and trampled all over your feelings. Then I ran, even though I know that sometimes in this world you don't get the chance to see someone again, to say you're sorry. I know that, but if I'm just going to repeat history, then how's that any different than knowing nothing at all?" Granted, Kyo chose to fall back on old patterns, but at least he recognizes this. You can't find a solution to a problem if you don't even recognize there is a problem in the first place. Sure, repeating history seems like one doesn't know anything at all, but take that recognition and build off of it, striving to improve one's skills. In the end I'd recommend that we live a life with no regrets; it sounds like Kyo regrets running yet again because he knows that sometimes you don't get a second chance. Even though it was probably terrifying to face Tohru after admitting his feelings and past, Kyo likely wouldn't regret it if he had chosen to stay instead of running. Ultimately, though, no experience is a waste; each experience is a learning opportunity. The universe will give us as many opportunities as we need to learn and grow.
Kuma Kuma Kuma Bear deals with similar themes. Yuna is rather detached from the world, not feeling any kind of affection or connection to anyone in her life. While she doesn't appear to hate anyone/the world, she doesn't have a passion for it and often escapes through video games. After spending so much time in the VR game realm, the game moderators request that Yuna complete a survey.
Navi: "Would you consider World Fantasy Online more fun than real life?"
Yuna: "Well, yeah, obviously. The real world is way too much work."
Navi: "Is there anyone you treasure in your real life?"
Yuna: "I've never really thought about it to be honest."
Navi: "Is there something that you treasure in real life?"
Yuna: "Uh, money I suppose... for right now."
Navi: "Do you believe in God?"
Yuna: "Nah, I believe in myself more than anything. After all, I'm the person who got me this far."
Navi: "Last question: do you think your newly acquired bear set is cute?"
Yuna: "Hm? Uh, sure. It's cute enough."
Navi: "Thank you very much. Without further ado, please enjoy the new world."
Many people likely share Yuna's sentiments. Many likely feel that this world that we live in is subpar. There is a lot of focus on working hard, being productive, being successful, etc. While these things are not inherently bad, the focus should be on balance and partaking in these in moderation. In today's society it is drastically imbalanced; people tend to overdue it, pushing themselves too hard and not partaking in rest when necessary. People are driven by money in today's society, focusing on earning the next dollar. Many likely feel betrayed by the world, the universe, even God. There are those that even question if an entity such as God even exists, opting to believe in themselves and what they can personally accomplish like Yuna. While I hope that people have at least one person they treasure, a lot of people seem to feel extremely disconnected nowadays. With society being in such a state many would likely take up the offer to go to a new world, whether it be a VR world, a game, or another planet/galaxy. They are tired of this world and its challenges. Yuna finds herself in an entirely new world in her new bear outfit, but she is no longer her gaming avatar--she appears as her Earthly body. She becomes rather confused and then receives an email. Yuna is in disbelief because the sender listed on the email is "God." The email reads, "Congratulations, Yuna! Clap, clap, clap, clap! Starting today, you'll be living in this fabulous new world that I manage. The Bear Set was a present from me! I do hope you'll enjoy what this world has to offer, and maybe even fall in love with it one day!" Yuna doesn't know what to make of this email, trying to make sense of it she speculates it might be an event of some sort. From a logic standpoint her speculations make sense; Yuna was preparing to enter and play World Fantasy Online, so a special event would make sense. She begins to pick up that things aren't what she first presumed, though. As she travels and explores the town of Crimonia with Fina, Yuna realizes, "It looks like a normal town in the game, but the people and shops are all unfamiliar to me. Something just seems really off about it, and for some reason everyone is staring at me." Granted, the reason they stared is due to her unusual outfit; bear outfits aren't typical for people to wear. Later upon finally seeing her reflection in a mirror, Yuna remarks, "It's really me, not my avatar. There's no denying. I'm not playing a game anymore. I've been isekai'd. No matter how hard I look, no one has a player or NPC tag on them. Oh, well. It's weird, but it's not like there's any real reason for me to go back to my boring, old world. So I guess I'll just enjoy this opportunity to experience another place!" Yuna truly is adaptable; as much as people may want to travel to a new world, their readiness for actually doing so may be questionable. Yuna is in a different, new world, and she has no way of returning to her home. That would cause concern and alarm for many people; many people would likely panic in such a situation because they're not at the point in their journey where they could thrive in such a situation. Many people are still ensnared in fear's net right now in society. More and more are breaking free in light of all that's transpired recently, but not everyone is there yet. Yuna is able to jump straight in, fearless, and decides to make the most of this new opportunity.
No matter what others say to Yuna she keeps her cool; she's so level-headed. So many people underestimate and belittle her, due to her appearance (being a girl and wearing a bear outfit). She doesn't hold it against them, though. It all flows like water off her back. Yuna's a great example for how to take others' criticism. One major example of this is when Yuna goes to help out a village that is being terrorized by a black viper because all of the high ranking adventurers are unavailable being that they are out on other quests; the villagers, specifically Kai's father, don't believe Yuna is capable of much of anything.
Kai's father: "So, you're a pretty low-ranked adventurer, aren't you? What exactly are you hoping to achieve?"
Yuna: "I came here to collect information on the snake, and if I can, I'll also take it down."
Kai's father: *scoffs* "IF you can?!" *laughs* "There's no way!"
Yuna: "I'll be the one to decide that, thank you. Hurry and tell me everything that you know about the black viper."
*later*
Yuna: "Okay, thanks a lot. I'll go and check it out."
Kai's father: "You're serious?!"
Yuna: "Sure am. Oh, one more thing. If this goes south, use me as a distraction, and you guys run away."
Kai's father: "Escaping the viper is impossible. We'd never make it. We'd all die."
*later after Yuna easily defeats the black viper*
Kai's father: "I'm sorry, young lady, and thank you. If it weren't for you, we would have died."
Yuna: "It's fine. Nobody would think a bear girl like me could defeat a black viper. I understand your doubt."
Kai's father: "Our entire village is indebted to you. If there is ever a way for us to repay you, all you have to do is ask."
Yuna: "Cool. I guess you guys are indebted to me forever, then."
Yuna doesn't let others' thoughts belittle her self-worth. When Shia remarks, "Sorry, but I'm not buying it. I just can't take a girl in a bear suit seriously," Yuna thinks dryly to herself, "Well, your disbelief doesn't make me any less capable." She doesn't let others poor attitudes skew her choices; she stays true to who she is and will help them because it's what she wants to do. She doesn't let others stop her from doing what she wants. When Yuna wishes to join the guild, an adventurer, Deborane, scoffs at the idea, but Yuna isn't afraid to stand up for herself.
Deborane: "Whoa, now! Come on, don't tell me you're actually taking this kid seriously, Helen. This ain't playtime. If we let a pip-squeak in, it'll lower the standard of adventurers."
Helen: "Please, calm down. I'll have to report you to the guild master if you cause more problems, Mister Deborane."
Deborane: "Look, I'm just worried that this little kid is gonna be gobbled up by monsters. Kids like her should be at home with their mommies, not tryin' to play with the big boys."
Yuna: "If you want, I'd happily defeat a goblin. I'm sure that would prove my strength, right?"
Deborane: "A goblin, huh? No matter how weak they are, a puny twerp like you ain't no match for them."
Yuna: "Excuse me, if I wipe the floor with that goblin dude, will you let me register?"
Deborane: "You've got some nerve for a brat! Did you just call me a goblin!?"
Yuna: "Huh? Are you a hobgoblin then? My bad. Sometimes it's hard for me to tell you monsters apart."
Deborane: "You're dead! Let's take this outside! I'm about to show you what it's like to be a real adventurer!"
Yuna then proceeds to knock him out with a single bear punch. In the blink of an eye Deborane is down and out. Yuna is a perfect example of why one shouldn't judge a book by its cover. Covers can be misleading (whether intentional or not). Yuna is incredibly smart, having learned quite a bit from all her gameplay experience, and she has a super-powered outfit that lets her accomplish incredible feats. She doesn't let others decide what she can and cannot do. When Yuna noticed orphans standing around the marketplace in hopes that people would give them food, and she decides to order 30 extra kebabs to feed the orphans. The kebab merchant probably shares a similar mindset as many people as she warns, "Don't do it. Even if you can feed them all today, what about tomorrow?" Yuna doesn't let this pessimistic line of thought stop her, though. She starts with getting the kebabs anyway to deal with the problem of the orphans hunger in the now. Nothing will improve for the orphans if everyone were to act off of the merchant's belief system. They'd likely starve. Yuna starts with focusing on what she can do in the now: buying kebabs before tackling the larger problem of the orphans hunger and lack of food. Yuna goes to the orphanage to see what she can do to help and begins fixing up the orphanage. The director is grateful and asks how they can thank Yuna. Yuna is incredibly humble about her assistance, remarking, "I didn't do that much--just little fixes, and I had some extra leftover meat from all my wolf hunting, so..." In the grand scheme of things, those actions may seem minor, but they mean the world to the orphanage. It's so much more than other passersby have done for them. The director, Bow, is grateful and tries to understand Yuna, inquiring, "Why go through all this trouble for a bunch of strangers?" Yuna merely acts out of human decency and replies, "No reason. I just think that children deserve to be happy." Yuna knows that the assistance she provided isn't enough to sustain them long-term, so she strives to discover a way for the orphanage to become self-sufficient so they won't have to rely and be dependent on others. After learning of the demand to acquire eggs but the supply being limited due to the issue of transporting the delicate goods, Yuna uses her connections and skills to set the orphanage up for success and announces, "Guess what? You're all winners! But lucky for you, the prize is job security! Basically, the job is taking care of the kokekkos together at the orphanage... You gotta let the kokekkos play outside, clean their coop, and give them plenty of food, so they're always happy--and do it every single day. Also, you have to deliver the eggs you collect in the morning to the shops."
Bow: "I think I get it. Basically, we'll run the orphanage using profits made from selling the expensive eggs, right?"
Yuna: "Uh-huh. Once you get used to raising them, then we'll increase the number of kokekkos, which of course means there'll be even more eggs daily."
Tiermina: "Hold on just a second. Won't having more eggs decrease their overall value?"
Yuna: "Yeah, that's what I want. If they stay expensive, then people might target the orphanage and the kokkekos. Not to mention, I'm going through the merchant's guild to provide a legit front for extra security. So, if something were to happen, they'll invoke the name of the Bloody Bear."
Bow: "So you put this whole plan into action just for us?"
Yuna: "This is the most I can do for you. Everything else is up to you guys."
Bow: "I won't lie--this is going to be very hard work, children. Ultimately, I'll leave the decision up to you."
Little girl: "If we agree to do the work, does it mean the director and teacher can stop crying? Okay, I'm in!"
Yuna doesn't let the fact that something hasn't been done before stop her. She doesn't let the illusion of something seeming "impossible" deter her. So many others would have decided that the orphanage is a lost cause, that it's impossible for them to do anything to help. Heck, the kebab merchant basically decided that giving the orphans food was a lost cause. Yuna doesn't let such limiting beliefs stand in her way or restrict what she can accomplish. She goes for it even if it seems like the odds are against her. Once the lord of Crimonia, Cliff, discovers that the orphanage's funding has been being stolen, he rectifies the situation and offers to reinstate the funding, but the orphanage no longer requires the funding. The director, Bow, remarks, "With all due respect, we no longer need to be funded. Thanks to Miss Yuna's help, we have obtained a means to live without needing your assistance. Things may not go perfectly, but we're hopeful for the future. And with such wonderful children, I'm sure it will be a bright one at that."
Lord Cliff concedes, "Right, I see. Well then, will you at least let me do some renovations? It seems someone was kind enough to patch things up, but it still looks a little shaky. Thank you, Yuna. If not for you, it might have been even longer before I discovered the depth of Enz's crimes." If Yuna had opted to go with the crowd and opt for inaction, the suffering would have only continued due to Enz siphoning off the funding to line his own pockets. It illuminates the importance of following our hearts and intuitions despite any "evidence" that it will not prove fruitful. We never know what we are truly capable of until we attempt to do so. Yuna feels some regret over how she handled the situation, though, groaning "I mean, I bailed out the orphanage, labeled the lord as some kind of evil jerk without really investigating things, and then got childish revenge on him by refusing to sell him eggs. I'm the worst. I hate everything! I'm so embarrassed I could die!" Perspective matters. Fina, recognizing that Yuna didn't see the whole picture, emphasizes, "Mom told me what you did. How you helped out the town orphanage when they were in trouble. Sometimes I saw those children standing around town, begging for food, but the worst part of it was knowing that there was no way I could really help them. You were different, though, Yuna. You were able to save those children, and in the process you made some bad people pay for their crimes. I mean, that's pretty amazing if you ask me. Thank you for doing such a good job today." Sure, maybe Yuna didn't handle the situation the best instead of treating Lord Cliff more fairly instead of jumping to conclusions, but she acted. Nothing will ever change if people opt for inaction. How many people must have walked by those same orphans and done nothing, convinced that they could not make a difference? Maybe the others couldn't have done it alone, but if they banded together, they likely could have improved the orphanange's living conditions. How many people in our world are like the others in Crimonia, who convince themselves that there's nothing they can do? Yuna proves that we can accomplish a lot more than we might originally believe.
Sometimes all we need is a little imagination and to believe. It certainly works for Yuna. Yuna recognizes, "So I can use magic just by imagining it. That's not too different from the game.... My magic is special. If I want a spell to be powerful, then all I have to do is imagine it to get the results I want!" Life is like a game. Our thoughts and beliefs hold power over what we accomplish. If we believe we will never amount to anything, we never will because we won't put forth the effort; it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. We end up giving up before we even begin. That can't be said for Yuna, though. Even if something should be "impossible" by logical reasoning, she doesn't let it dictate her course. Starting out in the guild she takes up a quest to take care of some wolves. As a beginning adventurer, everyone expected her to get the normal wolf or two. Yuna blows all of their expectations out of the water by taking out the entire pack--forty wolves in total. The guild is left in disbelief that she took out forty wolves all by herself. That isn't "normal" (although, one could argue that others aren't reaching their full potential due to limiting beliefs). The guild is impressed, but they don't understand why Yuna didn't harvest the wolves herself. She doesn't know how to harvest, so she decides to partner up with Fina, who is quite knowledgeable about harvesting and could use the cash to help care for her sick mother.
Gentz: "Here, this is your payment for the wolf."
Yuna: "Thank you. Let's see... It's only fair that I give you half of it, so here."
Fina: "That's too much! I can't accept it! After all, you were the one who defeated the monster."
Yuna: "But you did all the harvesting. Besides, you could use the money to help your sick mother, right?"
Fina: "That's true... but it's still way too much!"
Yuna: "Then what if you showed me around town? I could pay you to be my tour guide, and it'll even out."
Fina: "Um, are you really sure?"
Gentz: "Fina, I think it'd be smart to accept this young lady's request."
Fina: "Okay then, I will!"
Honestly, it feels like the universe was calling me out with Fina. Accepting what others/the universe wish to give me has been something I've struggled with. I understand Fina's conflict with feeling worthy. Even if the other person believes whole-heartedly that it is fair and it's what they want to do, conditioning leaves you feeling like you don't deserve that much. She's humble and recognizes that Yuna accomplished the task of defeating the wolf, something that would be a struggle for Fina. The thing is, harvesting is just as important a task--if Fina hadn't harvested the wolf, Yuna would have nothing to trade in at the guild, meaning she would have earned nothing. Both are equally important tasks, making Yuna and Fina's relationship symbiotic, which means Fina needs to learn to stop selling herself short. She helped Yuna out considerably, so why belittle what Yuna feels Fina's assistance is worth to her? This is something Fina struggles with; she can easily see the good qualities Yuna has but is slow to recognize her own (it reminds me of the rice ball metaphor from Fruits Basket--people struggle seeing their own good qualities because they're stuck on their backs, making it much easier to see another's good qualities). Fina stresses to Yuna, "You hired me, but there's still so much I don't know, and I wanna make sure that I'm useful to you!" Yuna doesn't understand why Fina is so worked up and reassures, "Don't be silly. You're already super useful to me." Despite the reassurance, Fina doesn't believe it, so she decides to shadow Gentz so she can improve her harvesting skills; she feels compelled to push herself and try even harder. When Gentz inquires how long Fina intends to shadow her, she fumbles with her response, replying, "Huh? Uh, until I'm a better harvester?" While it's true that Fina does indeed desire to be a better harvester, she's truly choosing to avoid her problems. She feels unworthy of Yuna's time; she doesn't feel like she deserves to spend time with Yuna, especially when so many other people love Yuna and require her assistance. Despite her desire to spend time with her friend, she feels that she is unbefitting Yuna's company because Yuna can do all these incredible feats, like slaying the black viper, the kraken, saving the orphanage, saving villages, etc. She feels ordinary and subpar in comparison.
Fina: "Recently I realized something. Yuna is somebody who is amazing at everything she does, and no matter where she goes, people adore her."
Gentz: "I mean, that is true. After all we wouldn't be a family if it weren't for Yuna's help."
Fina: "Because I owe her so much, I couldn't just tell her that I wanted to spend time with her. I didn't want to come off as selfish. I'm not a princess, and I can't make delicious food. I'm useless... except for harvesting monsters."
Gentz: "Oh, wow. You're always acting so mature. Sometimes I forget you're a ten-year-old kid. It's okay. You're allowed to be selfish. If you want some time alone with Yuna, just tell her that. Go out there and find your courage... Otherwise, you'll be like the old me."
Noir, noticing that Fina was unhappy, urged her to be more aggressive with what she wants. Noir recognizes that it's okay to want things, that it's okay to be happy, and that it's important to speak up for what you want. When Fina chooses to remain silent, however, Noir attempts to remedy the situation because both Yuna and Fina are miserable since they haven't been seeing each other (since Fina is avoiding her to devote time to become a better harvester and "worthy").
Noir: *sigh* "Typical Fina. And after I told her to be more aggressive."
Yuna: "It's so weird. I was used to being on my own, and, honestly, it was easier that way. But lately things have changed, and my heart's started to feel a little empty inside. I eat, sleep, and do whatever I wanna do. So I should feel happy, but I'm not. And it's like something is just missing."
Noir: "In that case may I ask a question? Hypothetically, if someone you knew began to distance themselves from you or avoid you entirely, what would you do?"
Yuna: "Nothing I guess."
Noir: "What if... it was Fina? ... I suppose there are things that even you don't understand."
Yuna: "Well, duh, at the end of the day I'm still just an ordinary girl, or a bear I guess. Sorry, but I've got something that I need to take care of. Thanks for the advice, Noa."
A closed mouth doesn't get fed; as intelligent and intuitive other people may be, they don't always know what's on your mind if you don't tell them. Communication is key. Speak up. Speak your truth. Fina and Yuna realize that it's okay to voice your opinions and wishes. If you remain silent, things won't change. Things will remain stagnant. What you want might just slip through your fingers if you wait around in silence. Don't live a life of regrets, especially one due to inaction. Yuna and Fina find each other and speak what's on their minds.
Yuna: "You know I'm not from here. My hometown's super far away. It's so far that I'm not sure I could get back even if I decided to try. Over there I did whatever I wanted every single day, but I was alone... In all the time I've been here, I've never given serious thought to going back there. I'm not really the type of person who gets easily attached to particular people or places. That's why I initially didn't plan on staying here in Crimonia, and I certainly never thought I would end up hiring someone I just met... like a young girl in the forest."
Fina: "Then why did you?"
Yuna: "There were a few reasons. Like how I can't harvest or that Gentz asked me to help you. It's kinda hard to pin one down. But you know, after spending time with you being around you started to feel so natural and comfortable, and I've never felt that before. In the end the reason doesn't matter. Because now... you're someone I care about."
Fina: "You really mean that? 'Cause I... feel the same. I care about you! And I want us to spend more time together! Just the two of us, okay?"
Yuna: "Yeah, even if I'm a bear?"
Fina: "Miss Bear, you're not going to eat me, are you?"
Yuna: "I would never."
Life can be unpredictable, but the universe always provides us what we truly need right when we need it. We meet the right people at the right time. We're in the right place at the right time. Synchronicity is a very real phenomenon. The universe will often surprise you. You never know what exactly will happen. This is exemplified in Kuma Kuma Kuma Bear. Sometimes life will give you exactly what you ask/wish for. Yuna remarks, "Aw man, I just wish I could eat eggs more often. I beat that black viper not long ago. Maybe I picked up some cool, useful skill. Not that things are ever that convenient. Eh? Bear Transfer Gate?" Turns out her new skill will allow her instantaneous teleportation. When Yuna questions Fina on if there are other spells like it, Fina answers, "No, not a single one. I've never heard of such convenient magic--not in my whole life." Ask and you shall receive. Everything has a purpose and reason. If Yuna hadn't acquired this skill, she would have been unable to assist the orphanage in becoming self-sufficient by selling eggs because she wouldn't have been able to easily acquire kokekkos from the village she saved from the black viper. Everything is interconnected to weave a story. Each meeting, event, and interaction builds upon the last. Removing one piece will change the entire story--if Yuna hadn't gone to the village to defeat the black viper, she wouldn't have the means to help the orphanage.
The synchronicity and life providing exactly what we need is further exemplified when Shuri and Fina go off to find the snow crystal flower to help their mother and Gentz. Shuri and FIna end up rescuing a trapped bird and watch as it flies away, grateful that the bird has no injuries.
Shuri: "That's great! ... But it wasn't the flower we needed..."
Yuna: "Think of the positives. Like, you saved the bird because you refused to give up on your search for the flower."
Shuri: "Yeah..."
*a gorgeous feather drifts down towards the girls*
Yuna: "It's so pretty."
Fina: "I wonder if the bird gave it to you as a thank you."
Shuri: "Probably! I've got an idea! What if we gave this feather to Mom and Uncle Gentz instead of the snow flower? Do you think they'll like it?"
Fina: "I bet they would love that, Shuri."
Upon returning home, Shuri and Fina are met by a worried mother and Gentz. They admit that they went in search of the flower because they remember how much they had loved when they found the flower as young adventurers back in the day with their father.
Fina: "We couldn't find it [the snow crystal flower], though."
Shuri: "But we found this! Here! It's not a flower, but you guys can still have it."
Gentz: "No way."
Tiermina: "You're saying you found that feather today?"
Shuri: "Yeah, a bird gave it to us."
Fina: "It was actually caught in a bramble, but Shuri found it and set it free."
Tiermina: "I see. It's just like..."
Gentz: "The one Roy had. Fina and Shuri's father used a similar feather and always wore it as a sort of good luck charm."
Fina: "Our dad had one?"
Tiermina: "I remember it well. It was so beautiful."
Gentz: "He always wore it with his equipment."
Tiermina: "Yes, he treasured that feather. I can't believe that the two of you brought back something so similar, and I'm sure that it was a special message just for you. To reassure you."
Gentz: "Roy was always such a thoughtful guy."
Tiermina: "Yes, he must have been worried about us. The three of us went so many places together and had so many adventures. How nostalgic."
Gentz: "You're right, but, Tiermina, Roy is still watching over us, and because of that I feel more confident. I know that I'll be able to protect not only you but the girls, as well."
Shuri and Fina were convinced that what they needed was the snow crystal flower. They searched high and low for the flower but came up short. They were disappointed that they were unable to find it, but they walked away with something better. The feather the universe gifted them with held so much more significance than the flower. The feather held special significance to their father and was connected to all the adventures the three, Roy, Gentz, and Tiermina, had together. So often we think we know what is best, that we know what will fix the situation or what we need. The universe knows more than we do, though. If we can let go of our expectations, control, and how we think things should go, we'll be surprised at what life provides us. Shuri and Fina let go of finding the flower and ended up walking away with a much more meaningful connection and sign from their father.
People get caught up in how they think things should be so often. They become so ensured that they end up doing things they wouldn't normally do. Ghoulzam, bitter with how things played out in the kingdom, decides to enact revenge on the king. So entangled in his rage and craving for revenge, he decides to delve into forbidden magic that drains his life force--so desperate for his vengeance that he's willing to sacrifice his own life to achieve it. Events don't play out in Ghoulzam's favor, though. Yuna puts an end to his attempt to destroy the kingdoms with an army of monsters.
Ghoulzam: "Why, you little--! Who are you?!"
Yuna: "Just a bear passing through the forest, but now that you ask, who are you?"
Ghoulzam: "That's not your business! Do you really expect me to believe you're a bear? You're spouting nonsense! The king sent you here, didn't he?! I've spent years building my army of monsters, and you defeated them in mere minutes! I've been bested by a girl in a bear costume!"
Yuna: "Look, I don't know what's going on, but there's no need to insult my outfit like that."
If something isn't meant to happen, despite all your meticulous planning, it will not come to fruition. The universe can dismantle it all in an instant. Ghoulzam found this out the hard way as Yuna defeats his massive army with complete ease. Despite how justified you might feel, your perception may not be valid. Everyone is entitled to their emotions, but your view on events may not be the truth. The real truth will always come to light.
Everyone has different perspectives, though. What seems natural to you may seem bizarre to someone else. Yuna is very at one with herself and knows what she wants--she's willing to go above and beyond for the people that she cares about. The wellbeing of those she cares for is priceless. After Yuna defeats the army of monsters, the king requests an audience with her to thank her for saving the kingdom.
Yuna: "I don't want anyone fussing over me, and to be honest, I only defeated those monsters because they were interfering with something else... my friend was worried about her father's safety while travelling through the forest. So I had to defeat the monsters on my way to pick him up."
Sanya: "On the way?"
King: "Now wait one minute. Let me make sure I've got this straight, young lady. You defeated an army of monsters merely because your friend was worried about her father's safety?"
Yuna: "In my humble opinion, Your Majesty, 'merely' implies that it wasn't important, and it most certainly was to me."
The king belittled what Yuna considers to be of value, and Yuna isn't afraid to speak up for herself. Yuna constantly speaks her truth, regardless of who is listening (even someone society considers to be of utmost importance). She knows what is important and acts accordingly. What others say and think is of little significance; it won't stop her from being herself and protecting what she finds of value. She is always 100% herself. She is willing to fight for what she feels is right, willing to undergo challenges to protect others and ensure the happiness of children. Upon coming across a seaside village that is being terrorized by bandits and a kraken, which cuts off all of their access to supplies and food, Yuna stays true to herself and lends aid in her typical generous manner. She offers to provide free food so the villagers don't have to pay the exorbitant prices set by the guild merchant.
Atola: "Wait, you hunt?"
Yuna: "Well, of course. I'm an adventurer."
Atola: *laughs* "How do you say that with a straight face? I'm sorry to laugh, but you gotta admit that's a pretty tall tale. And I would know if there was such a cutely dressed adventurer in this guild."
Yuna: "Look, lady, I'm not from your guild. I crossed the mountains from Crimonia."
Atola: "You're a real adventurer? You're serious!? A child crossed the mountains from Crimonia? That's impossible!"
Yuna: "Uh, it's not impossible. I did it."
Atola: "You've slayed a tiger wolf pack, a goblin king, and a black viper? All of these quests were done solo and completed at 100 percent!? We're honored to have you! Welcome! ...So how much wolf meat are you willing to donate?"
Yuna: "Let's see. Would 5,000 wolves do the trick?"
Atola: "Oh, sure. Wait, 5,000?!"
Yuna: "Yeah, you got a good place to store it all?"
Atola: "Uh, no, of course I don't! No way we could handle that many wolves at once."
Yuna: "Right... What about a hundred wolves a day?"
Atola: "That works, but you sure, Yuna? That means you'd have to stay in Mileela for quite some time."
Yuna: "It's cool, I promised I would help. Guess you could say the ship's already sailed."
Atola: "Thanks so much, Yuna!"
Help can come from the seemingly unlikeliest of places. Appearances can be deceiving. The right people, the right circumstances will always occur at the right time; the universe has beautiful synchronicity in that way. There's only going to be more and more of this beautiful synchronicity as people recognize what they are truly capable of and listen to their intuitions. Yuna illuminates all that is possible when we do so; the entirety of Mileela struggled with solving their problems of bandits and the kraken, but Yuna single handedly resolved their problems relatively swiftly.
Atola: "Not only did you capture a band of thieves and hunt a kraken, but then you go and dig a huge tunnel between both of the towns for us. I seriously can't thank you enough."
Yuna: "Yeah, can we talk about that? I'd actually prefer it if you didn't tell anyone about my involvement."
Cliff: "Don't you worry. We can say the tunnel was a joint effort between Crimonia and Mileela as part of our new agreement."
Miliane: "So there's no need to disclose your name."
Yuna: "Oh, thank goodness! 'Cause it would be super embarrassing if people found out that I dug a tunnel all the way through the mountains just so I could get my paws on some rice, fresh seafood, and a talented chef, who can cook food from the country of Wa. Anyway, it's in your hands now."
Cliff: "Yuna, are you trying to tell us you altered the landscape of an entire mountain range for personal gain?"
Miliane: "We can't let that slide, so we'll need your support on the tunnel after all, okay?"
Atola: "Yep, we're depending on your help, Yuna!"
Sure, altering landscapes merely for personal gain isn't necessarily the best thing to do, but in the grand scheme of things, everyone was able to benefit from it--Yuna was able to finally taste seafood again, and Crimonia and Mileela can benefit from trade and easy travel between the two locations that was impossible before due to the harsh conditions of the mountains separating the two. While her main motive was rather selfish, it is not like her actions led to misfortune for others involved--quite the contrary. Following her heart led to the benefit for all, and she remained true to herself throughout it all. As Atola remarks, "Yuna's capable of accomplishing impossible feats, but then when she's sleeping, she looks just like a normal girl." Yuna has desires like any other person. She is a normal girl at the end of the day; she wants normal things like the delicious food of her homeland and spending time with loved ones. At the end of the day Yuna is like all of us. The only difference (aside from the OP bear outfit) is that she doesn't buy into limiting beliefs, that things are "impossible." Even if it takes multiple trials and rethinking of solutions, she doesn't give up. She persists until she succeeds, and she wishes to see everyone thrive, not just herself. The world would be a much different place if we learned from Yuna and followed her lead. So many things would change because we wouldn't buy into the story of things being "impossible" or "just the way things are." We truly are capable of incredible feats when we give ourselves the opportunity. Take care and stay blessed with love and light, everyone~
Here's some food for thought from Ralph Smart:
Food for thought for this week: